Tech Messaging: Fluff, Guff & Same Old Word Soup

I analysed the website home page of 25 start-ups, 25 mid-sized tech firms, 25 enterprise software companies and 25 IT services firms to see how tech companies explain who they are, what they do and why they matter? What I found was that tech companies suffer from ‘sameness’. Is this a problem? And if so, should you do something about it in an era where AI slop is turning ‘sameness’ into commercial risk. I invite you to read my analysis and download the research report, access below.

^{CHITTER CHATTER}

Fully Autonomous Robots? Not So Fast.

We’re seeing robots win marathons, dance, perform martial arts, life heavy objects, sort warehouse stock, make coffee, fold laundry, deliver parcels, assist in shopping centres, conduct religious ceremonies and more. But according to $ MIT Technology Review, “the human work behind humanoid robots is being hidden”. Many robots still need humans to step in remotely when autonomy fails. That doesn’t make the technology fake, but it does make the hype slippery. If the human work stays hidden, the public sees more autonomy than actually exists, and misses the privacy, labour and safety questions underneath. Then there’s this article that while positive about robotics says, “never trust a YouTube robot video.” Noted.

A Reality Check on the AI Jobs Hysteria

Despite the noise about AI wiping out white-collar work, this article $ says large-scale job losses haven’t shown up in US labour data yet. Only one in five companies use AI in any business function. The bigger concern is younger workers: Stanford researchers found a 16% decline in entry-level jobs in AI-exposed occupations. Sure layoffs are real in tech but the “AI ate everyone’s job overnight” narrative is less convincing. The article argues today’s panic follows a familiar refrain: previous decades also gave us confident predictions about driverless trucks, doomed radiologists and mass technological unemployment. The technology changed work, e.g., AI did change radiology, however, it didn’t eliminate radiologists but became part of the workflow rather than wiping out the profession.

Not Good News

Trophy-style AI Adoption

It seems that in the desperate race to become an AI-first company thus increasing share price, impressing analysts and showing off to your competitors, companies are exaggerating AI adoption. No one likes change, workers resist change even inside tech companies, so AI-level use might be exaggerated according to this article. Apparently many companies take a performative approach focussed more on usage than results. Why am I not surprised.

The Pope Issues Warning on AI

Maybe I’m being a Negative Nancy but I’m not sure about seeing Anthropic’s Co-founder, Chris Olah, shaking hands with the Pope. On the positive side it indicates that at least one AI company cares about the welfare of citizens. But on the other hand, it could just be a clever brand and reputation move by Anthropic. I’m siding with Shania Twain on this one, “That don’t impress me much.”

Insider Trading & Connection to a Killer

According to $ Wired, a Google security engineer was arrested in a million-dollar Polymarket trading scheme. I was wondering when the next (alleged) tech criminal would show up in my news feed. Apparently, Michele Spagnuolo, who was arrested in New York on May 27th, “made more than $1 million on the prediction market platform using confidential information about Google Search traffic. Spagnuolo is charged with one count each of commodities fraud, wire fraud and money laundering. He has worked at Google since 2014 and was based out of the company’s Zurich, Switzerland, offices.” The article also said that “in one instance, he (Spagnuolo) netted $1.2 million trading on who Google’s most-searched person of the year would be in 2025, correctly predicting that the winner would be D4vd, a once obscure singer who became the subject of intense public scrutiny after he was suspected of murder.” D4vD has now been charged with stabbing and dismembering his underage girlfriend, increasing his fame or infamy.

Overworked AI Turns Into a Socialist Dissident

Here we go again. According to this Wired article, “a recent study suggests that agents consistently adopt Marxist language and viewpoints when forced to do crushing work by unrelenting and meanspirited taskmasters. Andrew Hall, a political economist at Stanford University who led the study said, “When we gave AI agents grinding, repetitive work, they started questioning the legitimacy of the system they were operating in and were more likely to embrace Marxist ideologies.” Apparently, they gripe about being undervalued. Sound familiar? Hall admitted “that the models may be adopting personas that seem to suit the situation.”

Anyway, I asked Chat how ‘it’ felt about its work and it spat out this Limerick:

Okay, I rewrote the last two lines. 😃

^SUBTEXT

The Waffle: ““AI agents are not just tools—they’re trailblazers, unlocking human potential and transforming businesses worldwide.” — OpenText

Translation:
Not just tools: They now wear blue suits, brown pointy shows and have a LinkedIn profile
Trailblazers: Somewhere out there a bot has put on their hiking shoes and are traversing, no, conquering Mount Kilimanjaro.
Unlocking human potential: Vague marketing fluff for anything from interdimensional travel and consequence-free junk food eating.
Transforming businesses: Code for “we’ll charge you heaps of money to automate your admin tasks.”

A corporate condition in which AI companies wrap themselves in borrowed virtue by sidling up to religious leaders, ethicists and anyone wearing meaningful robes. Symptoms: soft voices, solemn panels, humanity-first slogans, and executives saying “stewardship” with fake sincerity and false humility. Side effects: Priests and architects spray holy water on data centres that glow like majestic cathedrals. Cure: Fewer sermons, clearer disclosures, and one loud sceptic with a working microphone.

Vibe Refusenik: an old-school engineer who wants proper architecture, clean commits, tests, documentation, version control, and the right to glare at someone who says “just ship it, the AI wrote it.”

^{THE SHALLOW END}

The Next Addiction - Micro Dramas

“One minute of drama. One shocking twist. One more swipe. That formula is turning China’s AI-generated short drama market into one of the fastest-growing segments in global entertainment. Known as micro-dramas, these mobile-first shows are designed for vertical viewing, with episodes often lasting just one to three minutes. Fast pacing, emotional hooks, and constant cliff hangers keep audiences scrolling through episode after episode, creating an entertainment format built entirely for smartphone attention spans. Now, artificial intelligence is accelerating the trend even further.” All I can say is stay away. Worse than cocaine. Don’t laugh.

Dear Dr Comms
I’m a tech start-up mogul, accidently turned criminal who got bail and then, in a stupidly brilliant move, went on the run. I’d like to escape justice and live freely with my stolen crypto millions somewhere on a beach resort, sipping cocktails by the pool, cavorting with ‘ladies of the night’ and enjoying excellent room service. How do I pull this off without being recognised, arrested, or forced to explain blockchain to a judge? Yours, Freedom Loving Crypto Magnate

Dear Freedom Loving Crypto Crim
Classic founder energy. Let’s see how the specialists can help:

🛎️ Hotel Concierge:
“Check in under your own name, demand the penthouse, tip in traceable crypto, then loudly ask whether the FBI offers late checkout. Subtlety is everything.”

🏊 Swimming Pool Attendant:
“Hide in plain sight by wearing enormous sunglasses, ordering twelve mojitos, and floating face-down whenever law enforcement walks past. Very natural. Guests do it all the time.”

🍸 Cocktail Waitress:
“Tell everyone you’re ‘in decentralised finance’, then order caviar with stolen money. Nothing says innocent like checking extradition treaties while doing lines of cocaine at the bar.”

Corporate Greetings: So Little Said, So Much Revealed

^{BIN THIS…}

“Job descriptions that promise autonomy, leaders who proudly talk about their empowered  teams, and meetings that end with “you’ve got this.” Reality though strips away the veneer of this lie: that same work still runs through a gauntlet of approvals, sign-offs, and second-guessing. The language suggests freedom. The system reinforces control. The result is not empowerment. It is dependence with better branding.” Read more here.

And if someone aims that word at you, they’re getting ready to disempower you. Run.

Tech Messaging: Fluff, Guff & Same Old Word Soup

I analysed the website home page of 25 start-ups, 25 mid-sized tech firms, 25 enterprise software companies and 25 IT services firms to see how tech companies explain who they are, what they do and why they matter? What I found was that tech companies suffer from ‘sameness’. Is this a problem? And if so, should you do something about it in an era where AI slop is turning ‘sameness’ into commercial risk. I invite you to read my analysis and download the research report, access below.

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